Accepting You

Sometimes when we look in the mirror, we don’t really like the person we see. Why is it so hard for us to accept that person in the mirror? Some people just can’t see their true reflection. There is always something wrong.  There is a wrinkle here, a gray hair there, or some other minute imperfection that only they can see. Some can even look into a mirror and swear that the person they are looking at is 20 lbs heavier – when in truth, they are perfectly fine. I actually know someone who does this and it drives me crazy.  I start to wonder what happened to her to make her see something that is just not there.  Ok, I admit. I do it too.

But why? For me, yes it does have a little to do with self confidence. And I think that’s probably the bottom line for most of us who judge ourselves so harshly in front of a mirror.  So how come I’m not overflowing with self confidence? There is probably some psych mumbo jumbo that could place blame somewhere in my childhood. Society and the media doesn’t help either. I think it’s hilarious that while there is such a big push to promote loving your natural appearance and who you are, they still use the most attractive people to market their products.

Let’s take a look at Victoria’s Secret – which I am a ver big fan of by the way.  Do you see one average or even plain looking woman promoting their product? Ok, so some might not agree that all the VS models are pretty, but they are far from ugly. And how about their bodies? How many of us look like they do when we put on the lingerie? Why don’t they use “normal” women for models? I’m not trying to talk down about those of us who are not super models. But I hope you get what I’m trying to say. The message I get, is “You want to look like these women. They are beautiful. They are sexy.  Buy our product and you can be beautiful and sexy too.”  And how many of us look at those beautiful women and wish we looked like them? How many women do you know that go to outrageous lengths just trying to make themselves look as beautiful as those models?

Now how about the men? Isn’t it a bit hypocritical to say that women should not do so much to change how they naturally look when what catches their eye are those women who look a lot like those VS models? Would a guy even look at you if you went to a club and you looked they way you do in the morning? What men really want are the “naturally beautiful” women. Come on guys!! Give us a break. You want us to be confident with how we look naturally, but you drool over women who look like models. Some of you will even do it right in front of your girl. Yeah, that will make your girl feel beautiful about how she looks. And you wonder why women have a hard time accepting what they see in the mirror.

The truth is, many of us – no matter how hard we try are never going to be as gorgeous as those VS models. Ok, so with plastic surgery, you could do it. How many of us can afford to do that though? I’m not against those who go and get plastic surgery. Honestly, I’ve thought about it myself. The thing I struggle with is that I want to be able to look into the mirror and accept what I look like and say “This is me and how I look. There is nothing wrong with how I look.” I’m not saying that if you’re unhealthy that you don’t do something about it. What I’m trying to say is that, what you see in the mirror is probably not as bad as you think. If you really want to change something, then do it. But don’t lose yourself trying to look like someone else.

 

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