Tag Archive | mom

Following Through

I did it. I followed through with my punishment with the boys. It’s not that I usually don’t, but today I tried something different. And usually I’ll feel guilty or I’ll just take the shorter route – spanking or time outs.

Today I had asked the boys to clean up their room. Gio did his usual and ignored me – not even acknowledging that he heard me. Seppe did his usual whining baby act. I asked several times and even though they went to their room – they did not clean. It was obvious that they were just playing with the toys they were suppose to be putting away. After a few more attempts at asking them to clean their room, I started to get really mad. I started to raise my voice.

Then I found a bunch of toys – good and expensive toys- broken. I asked what had happened and who had done it. Turns out they had gotten into a fight and made each other mad so they broke the other’s toys. I just about lost it.

It was sooooo frustrating!! It had been a long morning. I was tired and annoyed as it is. Ben’s car broke down and had to go to the shop. The house was a mess. I really wanted to just Scream!

Let’s face it, we all yell at our kids at some point. I feel like that’s all I’ve been doing lately in order for them to listen – especially with Gio

Just when I thought I was going to freaking lose it – I stopped myself. Why Do I have to yell? I don’t like to. I don’t have a problem with spanking but honesty, I’m over doing that too. It doesn’t seem to be working anyways.

Instead, I firmly told them to get into their beds and Stay there until I told them they could get out. You would think that this would be Easier to do than spanking or time out – but it wasn’t. Keeping them in their beds was a challenge. It took a spanking the first time they got up to show them I meant business.

I had them in their beds pretty much the whole day. They were not allowed to play with any of their toys and I told them that I was taking away a bunch of them. Obviously they have way too many toys and just take them for granted. I will be boxing quite a few of them up and until they show me they know how take care of their toys, they won’t see them. And these will be their favorites that I take.

There were tears and lots of “I’m Sorry” “You dont love me” “Let me out” and so on. I ignored it all. They got up to use the bathroom then back to bed. I let them come out for dinner and even let them have dessert – then it was time to get ready for bed. I gave them
Hugs and kisses and told them I loved them – like I always do.

It probably sounds extreme. But I’m really hoping that this gets through to them. I love my boys with all my heart but I refuse to continue to let them disrespect me. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day :-)

What Should a 4 Year Old Know?

A very refreshing view about what is truly important for children to learn. I whole heartedly agree with everything in this post :-) I was so worried about Seppe but that is because I was comparing him to his brother. I have to accept that Seppe will learn what he needs to at his own pace and that doesn’t make him less talented than his brother. Sometimes we just need to step back, take a deep breath, and enjoy our children. They already grow up way too fast, there is no need to rush them.

A Magical Childhood

What should a 4 year old know?

It’s back to school time and children all over are starting preschool.  Many parents are frantically searching the internet to find out if their little ones are “on track” and know everything they should.

I wrote this article about what a four-year-old should know many years ago but it continues to be the most popular page on the Magical Childhood site.  I don’t think a week has passed in the past eight or so years when I have not received a letter from a parent, grandparent or teacher about it.  Parents and principals especially have said they wish more parents realized these things.

So in honor of the new school year, I’m posting it here…

What should a 4 year old know?

I was on a parenting bulletin board recently and read a post by a mother who was worried that her 4 1/2 year old did not know enough…

View original post 1,194 more words

My Job

Being a Stay At Home Mom IS a job. A very hard one . And I Dare anyone to say different. I think a lot of people take it for granted. When someone asks me “What do you do?” or “What is your job?” I proudly say “I’m a Mom.” Being a Mom Is a full time job, even if you have what I refer to as a “second job.” You never stop being a Mom.

Not everyone can be a Stay at Home Mom. Some of us have to be both Mom and Dad to our kids. And some of us are just not meant to be Stay at Home Moms. It takes a certain mentality to handle being at home with kids by yourself all day long.

Back when women were expected to stay at home, I can see why many felt trapped and wanted out.  No one likes being told they have to do something or be someone. Plus when you’re told that you can’t do anything else, it’s no wonder staying at home seemed like a prison. I’m sure so many women were depressed back then. But that is no longer the case. Women, have broken free from the kitchen and are now free to pursue their dreams, interests, and their heart’s desires. We no longer have to stay at home. We can be  superwoman with a career and be Moms at the same time.

That doesn’t mean that being a Stay at Home Mom isn’t a Job that you can be proud of and dedicate your life to. I think that in acquiring freedom from the house, some have gotten the wrong idea about being a Stay at Home Mom. I don’t have tons of “free” time. I’m not a lazy bum with no goals or motivation. I choose to be a Stay at Home Mom.

My days start early – even the weekends. I get myself and two boys dressed and ready, make breakfast, drop Gio off at school, entertain Seppe while I try to clean and organize the house, pick Gio up, make lunch, do homework, entertain both boys, make dinner, give baths, ready stories, and hopefully get them in bed by 8p. I manage to get in a workout during the times Ben is home. You might as well count Ben as a kid too. I may or may not have some peace and quiet after the boys go to sleep. Still have to put leftovers away, dishes, and pick up the toys the boys left out. If I’m lucky I’ll be in bed before midnight and the boys will sleep through the night (which rarely happens – one of them always wakes me up for something). Then I get to wake up and do it all again… Add in grocery shopping, practices, games, play dates, and birthday parties. I am always planning for something. I am always doing something.

It does take a toll on me. I am always tired. My only adult conversations are with Ben or short talks with parents from Gio’s class. The boys test me every day. I worry about them. I want the best for them and I’m not always sure that I am doing what’s right. I make mistakes and I lose my cool and of course feel guilty for it. But despite these challenges, I still Love my Job.

I have been there for every moment. Their first smiles, first word, first laugh, when the crawled, walked, and ran. I’ve watched them learn and grow. They’ve made me laugh and cry. They’ve amazed me. They keep me young. They remind me every day just how precious Life is. And there are going to be even more wonderful moments. Even though I do think of getting a “second job” – mostly to help with finances – there is no job out there that I would trade any of these moments for. I will be there for all of them.

I am truly grateful for Ben who works hard at his job so I can do mine. It is the Best Job in the world.